Slow Down, I just wanna get to Know You.

I was hanging out with an old friend. He felt so nervous around me like he was about to lose his virginity. He kept saying how nervous he was and even went to the bathroom to give himself a pep talk. I told him it wasn't like that and not going down like that either. He says "If I wasn't being such a punk and acted more aggressively I would've been cool." That frame of mind bothers me because some guys think they need to be the aggressor in a one on one moment even if the woman is saying no. A woman is going to make her own decision and what the guy does at the moment has little to no influence on what she'll do. She'll send out the vibes whether she wants to or not. Don't ignore them, READ them please! It's true, a woman does know initally whether she'll sex you or not. It may change, depending on how you are, not how aggressive you are when you're alone. I'm sick of guys thinking they have to attack or beg in order to get some. That's very uncomfortable and creepy, get out of her face!

Learn how to read body language. If you brush her hair aside, kiss her on her collar bone and she doesn't even flinch, well, she's just not that into you, maybe not that night. If she's leaning on you and touching you, those are signs that she's attracted but still she may not want to go all the way. Be gradual, if she does something, you do something. Back and forth, working together. Don't "superman that ho." If after heavy petting or she's now butt bald naked and she says "no I can't" as hard as it is STOP, leave or kick her ass out for leading you on and let her know that isn't cool. Don't pursue like you can change her mind. Even if she is playing games and wants you to continue, kissing all over you but still saying no, STOP and leave because she needs to know that this isn't something you play with and people can get in serious trouble. Then she'll keep it real from then on and even better, miss your...um ego. Because she wanted to act immature, she's going to have to wait for you and she'll probably won't have you with blue balls again. Let each other know, "either you do or you don't want to." simple right??

Men, please stop acting like getting vagina is a game. It's not. You're messing with someones emotions. I feel like you guys are on a horse trying to tassle us and when you do you say "gotcha bitch." Sometimes we want it just as bad as you do and we WANT to give it to you and receive it from you. You're aggression is a turn off, especially when we're giving off the "not now, not yet vibes" This isn't checkers, not a strategy game, it's life, everyone is different, who you are as a person will get you or not get you what you desire. Things will happen if its meant to be!

Ultimately people have to know what kind of situation they're putting themselves into cause some people don't know how to control themselves. If you're not ready, don't be alone with that person. If you're attracted like crazy but don't want to rush, don't be alone with that person. The flesh is weak but over powers us sometimes, especially when the meat is so tender and appetizing lol. Or you can act like a human and just control yourself lol

Be yourself always, take responsiblity for actions and be honest and upfront from the beginning my beautiful people.

LOVE is my AIR

I've been encapsulated lately by love. Not in the typical way we wish to receive love, getting attention from people we admire, attention from friends and strangers or loved ones. I'm talking about popping up in my everyday movements, little reminders of what true love is. While on Facebook, a friend posted an excerpt from one of my favorite songs from Lauryn Hill "Tell Him." "Let me be patient, let me be kind, make me unselfish, without being blind, though I may suffer, I'll envy at night, and endure what comes, cause he's all that I got and tell him." Then someone commented and said "I Corinthians 13" and I didn't even realize that until I read the chapter. The same person who made that comment then put up a video of a man talking about that same verse and how important it is. Then I go to someone's house and on their wall is...yes... a plaque with I Corinthians 13 written on it. Now I'm thinking my lord, my creator, what are you trying to tell me? I read the verse over and over and I talk to my mother about it. She said the lord is speaking because of the "lack of love in the world." Much of our turmoil can be traced back to a love we did not receive that we so desperately desire to have.


I come across a book on how to give and receive more love. "Alchemy of the Heart" Elizabeth Clare Prophet and Patricia R. Spadaro. Check that joint out.

In order to love others one must love them self ultimately and with that, a love for god because god is love and he made us in his image. Sounds familiar. This book is teaching self love first, giving without depleting and receiving it. A beautiful cycle. It also says "Love doesn't leave you where it finds you and it won't let you leave others where you find them either."

True love is aspiring to unconditionally love god the way that he loves us, and it's a given to love yourself, then send that out to others. When others are involved of course it isn't easy, there is much stretching of the heart required. But love surrenders all- the bible.

Today I stumbled on a movie called Love Trap where a man is seduced by a woman who aims to dismantle his engagement. The twist, the whore was went by her friend who is engaged to that same man. Women and our dumba$$ tactics.

A pastor tells him about the levels of love Agape, Philos, and Eros. Agape- god's love, the perfect love, unconditional, I Corinthians 13 and affection. Philos- bonding with friends and relationships, there's love but with limitations here, it can be broken, it's conditional, not perfect but sustainable. Eros- erotica, compassion, sex, temporary expression of love and will last just as long as the sexual desire is there, attraction. In order for a relationship to be sustained and become fully blessed by god agape must be the foundation that supports philos love which will lead to the great experience of eros. Picture a triangle cut in three with agape as the foundation, philos in the middle and eros at the top (the pointy end). If a love is based solely on eros, it's bound to fail, the triangle will soon topple over because it can't stand on the point for long.

Some of us have it twisted, letting that natural physical attraction lead us into sexual behavior with someone you're not in love with unconditionally. Gotta be patient & move past that initial attraction. It's hard because we're are sexy:) I know but that should be the icing on the cake, not the cake itself.

Love is all around us just like god but the problem lies in how we give and receive it.I believe I'm being bombarded with love because it's time for me to study what true love is and LIVE it. God is love, love for self, there's none like it. What is love to you?